The Buried Life: What Do You Want to Do Before You Die?

MTV's new reality series The Buried Life — premiering tonight at 10 p.m. — poses a simple question: What do you want to do before you die?

While we’ve all contemplated that question from time to time, few of us actually take the actions that bring our so-called Bucket Lists to life. But nearly four years ago, after graduating high school and “feeling like something was missing in our lives,” four dudes from Victoria, Canada — Ben Nemtin, Dave Lingwood, and brothers Jonnie and Duncan Penn — made a list, got in a fixed-up R.V. and hit the road for two weeks. As it turned out, two weeks simply wasn't enough time to get through the list, and certainly not enough to help other people along the way.

That's right: This was no ordinary Bucket List trip. For each mission they set out to complete, they promised to also help someone (generally a stranger) along the way. How very millennial of you, boys. And since it doesn’t get more Tonic than this — fun, service, hope and inspiration — we were extra stoked to get the lowdown on The Buried Life from two of its very own, Dave Lingwood and Jonnie Penn.Tonic: How did this idea evolve from a one-off road trip to a documentary to now a TV show?

Dave: So, after we went on our first trip, we got such a great response from people, we started getting emails from all around the world saying, ‘Can you help with this? Can you help me get in a hot air balloon? Can you help me fly a fighter jet?’  And then we also got emails saying, ‘You know, I can help you with ride a bull, or I can help you with, you know, number 67 on your list.’  We realized that we needed to keep on going… This was something that was really striking a chord in people. And we just knew that we had to continue on and keep asking the question and get people thinking about what they want to do before they die.

Tonic: So were there 100 on your list when you set out for those first two weeks?

Jonnie: We were gonna do 50 things on our list, and 50 things for other people, but we got so many done so quickly — we got like 24 done right off the bat or something … 'Let’s make it a hundred and take off the limit of the people that we help.'

Dave: It’s not as though it’s crossing things off the list, it’s more going after what you really want in life, and going after what you’re really passionate about. Like, we add and take away things off the list all the time.

Tonic: So what are some of the things that have come off the list?

Dave: There was like silly things, like go parasailing and stuff that we were like, ‘Guys, let’s not go parasailing.’ … We’ve been doing this stuff for four years, so you kind of grow out of some of the things.

 

No Misspent Youth Here

What makes this show particularly compelling — apart from its inherently adventurous nature, four extremely charismatic guys and a suped-up bus named Penelope — is its generous spirit. In stark contrast to some of MTV’s other twenty-something reality stars, The Buried Life is not concerned with hair gel, grinding, or getting ahead in the fashion world. (Not that there’s anything wrong with those things.) These guys are genuinely interested and inspired by working with others. A notion punctuated by their concept, and by their co-executive producer credits. They came up with the show; it wasn’t handed down by some network exec. Surely a positive sign of the times.

Tonic: So, which part has been the most fulfilling, accomplishing your things or helping other people? Or is it equal?

Jonnie: Well, I think right off the bat we learned that helping other people was just — it’s so much more lasting than crossing something off your list…  Everyone we met was completely random so we would just ask a complete stranger what they wanted to do before they die. And then we would kind of enter their lives, and to help them and see them cross that thing off their list or accomplish something, it’s just far more colorful than crossing anything of our list….  Each new time that we enter somebody’s life and get to see a glimpse of what they go through, it’s humbling.

Tonic: Tell me about some of those experiences.

Jonnie: We met a guy named Sam in Dallas, just on the street. He hasn’t seen his son in 17 years because he and his wife separated and she took the kids… We managed to track down his son and get on the phone and actually connect the two of them… When people ask me about the project I’ll usually tell them that story. Ten times for every one time I’ll talk about, Playboy or something, but there is something to be said for the things that we do — all the sweet things that are important. I think people like to feel invested in the list because it’s something that everyone does together. A lot of the things that we can create are with the help of the community of wherever place we’re in next.

 

The Secret to Uncovering the Buried Life

Among the many things Dave, Jonnie, Ben and Duncan have crossed off the list: open the six o’clock news (#1), become a licensed minister (#21), cut a ribbon at a major ceremony opening (#31), host a cooking show (#42), visit Fulsom Prison (#64), host a lemonade stand (#96).  And some things they've done for others: helped a girl learn to break dance, delivered a baby, got an iMac for kids in a school in Watts in Los Angeles.

Dave talks about the time they teamed up with Kids Cancer Care Foundation in Seattle back in 2007. Each of them got the chance to take a cancer patient (age 4-7) on a shopping spree at Toys ‘R Us for a few hours of unbridled, uninhibited joy. Without minimizing his enthusiasm, Dave makes it sound like it’s just another day at the office. In a way, it is. So then, why is it so hard for most of the world to get up and live their dreams? Overwhelmingly, they tell me the answer is fear (second only to money) — fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of what others will think. Tonic: So what’s the antidote? What advice would you give people?

Jonnie: The first step to getting past that is just telling someone — like making it bigger than yourself…. We wouldn’t be able to accomplish [things on the list] if it wasn’t the four of us … we have each individually given up a number of times along the way, but you just keep going because it’s a team. And, it’s the same with community stuff. 

Dave: Don’t just keep it to yourself, you know, tell your friends. Because if you’re not doing it, you’ll have someone be like, ‘Hey! Jimmy, you said you were gonna go bungee jumping, get over here and try it.’

Jonnie: And if you don’t have any friends in the world, we have a thing on our website that’s like a community where you can post your list, and people have actually kind of started making friends online and talking about the things that they wanna do, and getting help and stuff, so it’s available to anyone.

Get On Board

So while we could go on about their adventures at the Playboy Mansion, including a call with Hef himself, their attempt to play basketball with President Obama, tell a joke on Late Night, or break dancing in front of thousands in South Central LA, we'll let you watch it all firsthand in the upcoming weeks.

In return for what promises to be at least eight 30-minute segments of pure entertainment and inspiration, help support The Buried Life guys. For starters, they really want to dance with Ellen. (Who doesn't?) Email The Ellen Degeneres Show and request they be invited on as guests.

 

Tonic: Tell me about this partnership you have with the nonprofit OA Projects?

Dave: If we get 75,000 members on our Facebook page, then MTV and Social Vibe are partnering to fund a soccer camp in Uganda through Duncan and a Charity OA, which has soccer camps in third world countries trying to develop teaching through sport.

Jonnie: In short, if we get 75,000 members on our Facebook page, we can throw a soccer camp in Uganda.

Become a fan here.

And of course, the most obvious thing to do, would be to start your own list. Grab some paper, a pen and a friend or two — and start digging before you die.

Need more inspiration? Check out the poem that inspired the show's title:

 

But often, in the world's most crowded streets,But often, in the din of strife,There rises an unspeakable desireAfter the knowledge of our buried lifeA thirst to spend our fire and restless forceIn tracking out our true, original course;   A longing to inquireInto the mystery of this heart which beatsSo wild, so deep in us--to know?Whence our lives come and where they go.--Excerpted from the poem "The Buried Life" by Matthew Arnold, 1852

 

photos courtesy MTV