Wedding Politics: Should You Talk a Friend Out of Getting Married?

So your friend is not so giddy.

He/she is about to get married, and instead of feeling like all is right in the world, everything feels wrong. So wrong ... and cold. Mainly the feet. He/she is having cold feet, but more than just cold feet, it's sort of like you both know he/she is making a big mistake, but here's the pickle: do you tell your friend this, or do you stay silent? After all, can you imagine being the one they remember on their 50th wedding anniversary as the lone detractor to what ended up as years of matrimonial bliss?

Hmm ... It's a good, if not uncommon, question as the Frisky points out, what do you do? Your pal has pushed the date, but his fiancée has already bought her dress. So the question is: hurt her feelings now or hurt her feelings later when it's revealed he really thought they shouldn't have gone through with it?

Or, she's pretty sure her soon-to-be-Mister is still messing around with his used-to-be-misses, and you think it's probably true, so do you say, "send him packing?"

Maybe the lesson to be learned is this: just listen. Don't give an opinion until one is asked. And even then, tread carefully. Sometimes it's just classic cold feet or wedding jitters. Sometimes it's a chance to avoid a serious near miss. If your friend really seems like they're in a bad (read: dangerous or otherwise emotionally distressing relationship) that's one thing, and that means business. But if he/she just needs to work though some things, all the better for you: you've listened and didn't make any rash judgments so you can still be invited to the wedding that perhaps a lesser self-aware person would've said to call off.

Photo courtesy of Rachel James@sxc.hu.